Why is there an epic love poem in the middle of the Bible? How does the Song of Songs use marriage and romantic love as a metaphor for the intimacy Jesus longs to have with each person?

Bible Gateway interviewed Dee Brestin (@deebrestin) about her book, He Calls You Beautiful: Hearing the Voice of Jesus in the Song of Songs (Multnomah Books, 2017).

What’s the story behind the title of this book?

Dee Brestin: Women in a Milwaukee prison had just completed one of my Bible studies, and now I planned to introduce them to the Song of Songs. But as I was driving, I thought: What am I doing presenting such a challenging book to babes in Christ? They’ll go back to their cells and read this passionate love story and think: “What? What in the world could this have to do with Jesus?”

Yet I’ve also learned that my first leading is often right, and so I plunged ahead.

“There’s a Cinderella love story in the heart of the Bible that can help you see how deeply Jesus loves you,” I said. “There’s a great shepherd/king who falls in love with a common peasant woman. But she’s uncomfortable under his gaze, feeling unworthy. She protests: ‘Don’t gaze at me, because I am dark…’ (Song of Songs 1:6).”

They nodded. These women knew what it was like to feel unworthy. Many had never known earthly love, and then their failures and their prison sentences made them so ashamed. Even after they come to believe the gospel, they had trouble holding on to the truth that they’re loved and beautiful in his eyes.

“But the king doesn’t see her that way. Instead he tells her: ‘Behold, you are beautiful my love.’” (Song of Songs 1:15)

A woman near me gasped and then began to cry. Not wanting to draw attention to her, I kept teaching.

“This is the gospel in the Song of Songs: we’re unworthy, but Jesus, our great ‘shepherd/king’ cleanses us and makes us beautiful. In the Song, he keeps telling her how beautiful she is.” (Song of Songs 1:8; 1:15; 2:13, 4:1, and on).

Now the woman was sobbing so hard I finally stopped and asked: “Julia, do you want to share why you’re crying?”

“I do!” She took a moment to compose herself and then said: “All of my life I wanted someone to tell me I was loved and beautiful, but it didn’t happen. When I got old enough, I turned to men—and I’d do anything they wanted if they’d just tell me I was beautiful.”

She stopped and covered her face, and then said softly. “That’s how I wound up in here. I did things of which I’m so ashamed…. But then, through this ministry, Jesus found me. This morning I told him, ‘Lord, you’re so beautiful.’ And I thought I heard him say, ‘Julia—you are beautiful.’ I could hardly believe it—so I stopped and pleaded, ‘Say it again!’ But there was only silence.”

She looked at me, eyes shining with tears. “But tonight you come in here, open your Bible, and tell me he keeps saying, ‘You are beautiful.’ He said it again!”

A holy awe filled the room for God had met us all. It was then I knew the title of the book had to be, “He Calls You Beautiful.”

How do the themes of desire and longing relate to the heart of Christian believers?

Dee Brestin: So often we try to make his gifts fill up the longings of our heart, when what we’re really needing is him! So many who’ve tested this study speak of experiencing his presence in a way they haven’t before.

Why do you think Christians may be reluctant to study Song of Songs in-depth?

Dee Brestin: If you think it’s just about marriage, and you’re single, it seem irrelevant.

If you’re told it’s also about Christ and his bride, the extreme passion and earthiness of the book may make you react negatively, feeling that approach isn’t holy—even blasphemous. And yet—every other book in the Bible is about God and his people—so why would there be an exception? Commentator Derek Kidner writes: “It’s a bold and creative stroke by which God, instead of banning sexual imagery from religion, rescues and raises it to portray the ardent love and fidelity which are the essence of his covenant.”

Our world has trashed the marriage bed, but God says it’s pure (Hebrews 13:4). He uses many metaphors to show Christianity is a relationship, and they build in intimacy from Shepherd to Friend to Brother to Father. But the most intimate of all is a Bridegroom. Indeed, the Song shows us what Isaiah 62:5 tells us: that the Lord will rejoice over us “as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride.”

How does our hyper-sexualized culture lead Christians to misinterpret Song of Songs?

Dee Brestin: Errors of interpretation come through polarizing the Song to being only about marriage and sex or only about Jesus and his bride.

Up until the early 1700s, the most preached on book in the Old Testament was the Song of Songs—but they focused only on Christ and his Bride. They spiritualized everything, even saying that her two breasts represented the Old and New Testaments.

Today we often have a more serious myopia. If you hear the Song of Songs preached on at all, it’s usually almost exclusively from the perspective of marriage and the marriage bed—and Christ and his bride are lost. Some have even turned it into soft porn; sexualizing everything.

But there’s a fresh wind blowing that holds both pictures together. It sees marriage and the marriage bed, but also sees how this picture sheds light on the mysterious union of Christ and his bride, as Ephesians 5:32 says marriage does. As Dr. E. F. Davis explains in The Westminister Commentary, “Holding both pictures together enhances each.”

How Should Song of Songs be read differently than other books in the Bible?

Dee Brestin: The genre is poetry, and poetry is double-layered—so be sure to see both layers. And metaphors should not be pressed too hard—for example, though God “covers us with his feathers” (Psalm 91:4), he is not a mother bird. And though Christ rejoices over us like a bridegroom, (Song of Songs), he is not an actual physical lover.

Describe a few of the poetic pictures presented in the book and explain their purpose.

Dee Brestin: There are so many that penetrate our hearts with his love. The Song begins with “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth” (Song of Songs 1:2). As Mike Reeves explains, the Song is not an allegory where an image represents just one thing, but rather alludes to many things. A kiss from the king could be a verse from Scripture that becomes radioactive; an answer to prayer; the sense of his enveloping presence; or any other way he comes near to you and touches you.

One of my favorites poetic pictures is when the bride compares her beloved to a young stag leaping over the mountains. (Song of Songs 2:8). St John of the Cross said: “It is noteworthy that in the Song of Songs the bride compares the Bridegroom to the stag…She makes this comparison…because of the swiftness with which he shows and then hides himself. He usually visits devout souls in order to gladden and liven them, and then leaves in order to try, humble, and teach them.”

What are the three stages of love in the Song?

Dee Brestin: In both marriage and our relationship with Jesus we tend to go through:

• First Love: that euphoric courtship and honeymoon time (Song of Songs 1–2:13; Jeremiah 2:2; Revelation 2:4)
• Wilderness Love: a time of doubt toward our bridegroom, when we back up from him (see many segments in Song of Songs 2:14-5:9; Jeremiah 2:5 and 2:13; Hosea 2:13; Hebrews 3:7-15)
• Invincible Love: when you become confident, that no matter what, his love is here to stay (Song of Songs 5:10-8:14; Job 13:15; Psalm 18)

The Song shows us the purpose of the wilderness and how to get out of it. By the close of the Song, we read: “Who is that coming up from the wilderness, leaning on her beloved?” (Song of Songs 8:5).

What are your thoughts about Bible Gateway and the Bible Gateway App?

Dee Brestin: I use it all the time, loving the various translations and commentaries. And you keep up-to-date with your App. Thank you so much for your wonderful resource.

Bio: Dee Brestin is the bestselling author of numerous books including The Friendships of Women, which has sold more than a million copies. She’s involved in prison ministries and maintains a weekly Bible study blog through her website: deebrestin.com. A popular speaker around the country, Dee has five grown children and more than a dozen grandchildren. She lives in Door County, Wisconsin.

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